Nobody’s Home

home.jpgEmily Thorne — ‘Over time, we commit acts with intentions, either good or bad, that require forgiveness.’

I’ve gone astray before, I’ve set fires all over the place before and I’ve said and done things that I look back on today and still, they have me burying my face in my hands, well who hasn’t?

I mean who? Who? Who?
I may sound like an owl now, but, WHO?

Yeah and there will be the enemies of progress who don’t quite remember the quadratic formula, what a ribosome is and the preparation of insoluble salts but the shortcomings of other people? The memory of an elephant.

This is what gets under my skin: when you try redeem yourself all you hear is “A leopard never changes it’s spots” and the chapter of your life you’d rather not have read aloud is constantly being broadcasted.

When you’re trying to take a step in the right direction,
trying to extinguish the fires
trying to bury hatchets
trying to rebuild the bridges you burnt
trying to get back on track
Ultimately trying to get back home

There’s nobody to cheer you on, noone to lean on, everyone is just fixed on the possibility of you making a U-turn and others are fanning the glowing embers of your past. You’re knocking on the door so you can re-enter society and the hearts and minds of others but there’s nobody home because they are all going to town about your previous actions.

Pun intended

That’s just how people are, that’s just the way it is. Then why is it as clear as mud to us why people fail to convert themselves into better people? I mean come on people, sense was knocked into them, they mended all that they could, then they finally went to add the finishing touch, they went home; the people, the good way of life they once knew, the positivity that they lacked when they were away and there was nobody home to open the door for them with arms spread wide.

Nobody had enough faith in them coming back. Everybody wanted a scapegoat, “You think I’m awful, but at least I’m not as bad as so-and-so.” Everybody wants to be consoled as far as their sins are concerned so someone has to suffer and become the outsider.

“She can’t find her place
She’s losing her faith
She’s falling from grace
She’s all over the place, yeah
She wants to go home
But nobody’s home
That’s where she lies
Broken inside
With no place to go
No place to go to
To dry her eyes
Broken inside” – Avril Lavigne, Nobody’s Home

Nobody was home so why are you surprised that they are all over the place now?

 

 

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Independence Day

On the 18th day of April in the year 1980 Zimbabwe received its independence, now when will you receive yours?

One of the many things we fall slave to is the belief that we need approval from other human beings. The fact is that noone should determine who you are or where you’re going save for you. You should not need validation from anyone.

You just don’t know how lovely you are.

You are supposed to see the good in you before anyone else should or can but turbulence obscures the scene. You are supposed to see very clearly than, even without a voice present to tell you you’re enough, you are enough, you are supposed to see that noone should define you…but you know what, insecurity compromises our vision like a cataract.

A life placed in the hands of other people is a life of little joy, if your ailment is self doubt then its a temporary cure, it’s a quick fix that yields frustration in the longrun.
If you live for their acceptance, you die from their rejection – Lecrae.

Don’t hide your face, let the sun caress it and breathe the living air, don’t sweep your problems under the carpet, confront the turbulence that has made residence in your soul.

This is the difficult part, the battle is not against the external forces, instead it’s against yourself. You’re at liberty to choose the day of your independence, how abstract is that? It’s all up to you. Be the marionette your whole life or set yourself free by cutting those strings.

Worst Enemy

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There are wicked, wild waterfalls
And seas that are never at rest
And mighty mountains to top it all
To put you to the test
Antagonistic avalanches rushing down
Hoping you’ll go tumbling after
Forces trying to make you the clown
The source of all the laughter
The forests may wear frowns on their faces
They’ll be enemies protruding from the ground
Green with envy, many traces
That they just don’t want you around
Long enough for you to grow
And take your throne and Crown
Many stones they will throw
So you’re never safe nor sound
The earth may quake to deliver your demise
Rivers raging and your boat may capsize
They’ll shake your very being but you’ll survive
It’s not the end, you’ll eventually rise
But beware of the biggest brute, your worst enemy
She’ll send you down with no parachute, she wreaks of cruelty
She has the self destruct button in her clutches
If she wants she can bring destruction to everything she touches
Walk over to a mirror or a clear pool of water
And look deep into the eyes of whatever you view;
You’ll see she’s ready to slay and slaughter
And just in case you didn’t have a clue:
The most harmful effects on your health
Are those inflicted by you, no one else
You may be conflicted but the power is yours
The greatest battles and bloodiest wars
The most flamboyant bruises and deepest sores
The most debilitating criticism you can endure
Are all conjured up by your very own hand

The greatest tragedy is self sabotage
There’s no real beauty in it, it’s like a mirage
If you want to conquer great heights and acquire wealth
Start by being good to yourself